A deep values exercise. The client imagines how they would want to be remembered at the end of life. The aim is not morbidity, but contact with what truly matters and with the gap between current living and desired direction.
Step-by-step guide
- Create safety: "This is an unusual exercise, and it can feel deep."
- Invite visualization: "Imagine many years have passed and people have gathered at your funeral."
- Ask: "What would you want to hear? What was the most important value of your life?"
- Invite written or spoken response: "How would you want to be remembered?"
- Bridge to now: "What does this tell us about what matters this week?"
When to use
- Deep values clarification when surface methods do not work.
- The client is living on autopilot or according to someone else's life.
- Existential crisis can become a catalyst for change.
- The client is mature enough and ready for deeper work.
Key phrases
Imagine that a long time has passed and people have come to your funeral.
Follow-up questions
What would you want to hear? What was the most important value of your life?
How would you want people to remember you?
What does this tell us about what matters now, this week?
Alternative phrasings
A letter from your future eighty-year-old self to your current self is a gentler version.
Warnings
- ⚠️ Suicidal ideation: do not use with active suicide risk.
- ⚠️ Acute grief: stabilize first.
- ⚠️ Do not use before trust and safety are established.
Source: Existential therapy traditions (Yalom, I.); Hayes, S. C. et al. (2011). ACT integration
Materials are informational and educational and summarize publicly available scientific sources. They are not medical or psychological advice, are not intended for self-diagnosis or self-treatment, and do not replace consultation with a qualified professional.