Helps the client find their own inner position toward a situation, a person, or a decision. Linked with the third fundamental motivation — the right to be oneself. An authentic position is possible only when the person is not merged with a role, not crushed by the fear of judgment, and not "overheated" by an emotion. A position from strength is when you say not what is "correct", but what is truly your own.
Step-by-step guide
- Help the client separate the facts from the interpretations and "others' voices"
- Ask: "What do you think — not your mother, not your boss, not the 'right answer'?"
- Give space for an inconvenient, non-standard, "incorrect" position of the client
- Check: "Is this a position from strength — or from fear?"
- Help express the position — first in the session, then find a way in life
When to use
- With difficulties of self-assertion, conformism
- With difficulty saying "no", dependence on others' opinion
- When the client loses themselves in relationships or roles
- When working with the third FM — authenticity and dignity
Key phrases
What do you yourself think about this — when you are not thinking about what others think? Do you have your own opinion about this situation — not your mother's, not the right one, but yours?
Follow-up questions
Is there a voice in you that wants to say something different?
Are you speaking from yourself now — or are you saying what you think I want to hear?
Is this a position from strength — or from fear?
Alternative phrasings
If you knew for sure that you would not be judged — what would you say?
What would be truly honest — toward yourself — in this situation?
Warnings
- ⚠️ The therapist must not "shape" the client's position — even if the position seems wrong, first help to discover it
- ⚠️ Do not confuse a personal position with an impulsive reaction — a position is born in silence, not in affect
- ⚠️ Encourage a position that differs from the "expected" — that is a sign of growth
Materials are informational and educational and summarize publicly available scientific sources. They are not medical or psychological advice, are not intended for self-diagnosis or self-treatment, and do not replace consultation with a qualified professional.