A core cognitive defusion technique in ACT. Adding the phrase "I notice I'm having the thought that." creates distance between the thought and identification with it. The thought becomes an event in consciousness that can be observed, not a fact about reality or the self. The technique is simple to learn and powerful in practice.
Step-by-step guide
- Identify the original thought: "I am a failure," "This is impossible," or "Nobody loves me."
- Ask the client to say it exactly as it appears.
- Add the prefix: "Now say: I notice I'm having the thought that I am a failure."
- Ask about the difference: "Did you notice a difference? The first sounds like truth; the second sounds like observation."
- Practice two or three times with different thoughts.
When to use
- Any self-evaluative belief.
- Social anxiety: "People think I am strange."
- Depressive thoughts.
- As a first defusion technique for clients new to ACT.
Key phrases
Instead of saying "I am a failure," say: "I notice I'm having the thought that I am a failure."
Follow-up questions
Did you feel the difference? The first sounds like truth. The second is an observation.
Which wording gives you more freedom?
Shall we try this with another thought that bothers you?
Alternative phrasings
My mind is telling me that.
There is that thought again.
Warnings
- ⚠️ There are no specific contraindications; it is usable in most contexts.
- ⚠️ Do not use it mechanically; the client needs to feel the shift, not merely repeat words.
Source: Hayes, S. C. & Smith, S. (2005). Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life. New Harbinger
Materials are informational and educational and summarize publicly available scientific sources. They are not medical or psychological advice, are not intended for self-diagnosis or self-treatment, and do not replace consultation with a qualified professional.