Verbal mirroring of the client's current experience. Not interpretation, but acknowledgment of what is there. Creates the sense of "I am seen and accepted".
Step-by-step guide
- Observe the client (tracking)
- Name what you see/hear — simply and gently
- Formulations: "It looks like something important is here", "I see that this is not easy"
- Do not add interpretation — only what is observable
- Watch the response: does the client relax? Then contact is made
- If the client tenses — adjust: "Maybe I am off…"
When to use
- To establish and maintain contact
- When the client needs to be seen, or before moving into deeper work
Key phrases
It looks like something heavy just moved through you. I am not rushing you anywhere — I just want you to know I saw it, and I am here with it.
Follow-up questions
Something softened in your face just now — is that right?
That feels tender. Would you like to stay with it?
I see this is not easy — and I'm glad you are letting it be here.
I may be wrong about what I see. Can you tell me what is actually there?
Alternative phrasings
Contact statements are short. Leave space for the client to fill in.
Speak softly, and be ready to be corrected.
Warnings
- ⚠️ Contact is not agreement and not praise. It is acknowledgment of the reality of experience.
- ⚠️ Avoid clichés. Speak out of live observation.
Source: Kurtz, 1990; Johanson, 2006
Materials are informational and educational and summarize publicly available scientific sources. They are not medical or psychological advice, are not intended for self-diagnosis or self-treatment, and do not replace consultation with a qualified professional.